If someone had called me fat five years ago, I would have died a little inside. Fat was a word that used to scare me. It would scare me enough that I would retreat to the comfortable and safe space of my home to avoid humanity for a short while… So, what’s changed?
So what has changed?
For starters, I found the body positive movement and it completely changed my life. It also changed the way I look at myself and others and the best part is, it can work for you too. Regardless of your body type, there is a little safe space for everyone if you are willing to have an open mind.
Do I sound like someone who has it all figured out? Someone that found an easy road to self-love instead of self-loathing? Well, that is not always the case. This journey has not been an easy one. In fact, it has been a roller coaster of emotions. There have been tears, tantrums, depression and reclusiveness along the way and some days I still struggle… but has it been worth it? Hell Yes!
So now you’re happy being fat?
Like I said, the bad days still come and go but overall, I am much more positive. I now describe myself as a happy and positive person. A person who once saw the world through a narrow view point forced upon us by society but now I am able see the beauty in almost everything… and more importantly, everyone.
I am who I am and there is nothing I can do anything to change that. I figure, I should love myself instead of trying to turn myself into someone that I will never be.
A very wise person once gave me some advice, which I am now passing on to you:
“Be yourself. Love yourself… because everyone else is taken”
This quote has become a mantra for me. So now, I look in the mirror and most days I see a beautiful, confident woman staring back at me… and guess what – she’s fat!
She’s fat, but that’s okay. As Jes Baker puts it in her book, calling myself fat is no different to saying that I am wearing black shoes. It is a description, a description that I cannot hide from simply because I don’t like it. Being fat is one of the first things you notice about me, but it does not define me.
Being fat does not define me!
The reason it does not define me… I no longer let it. Of course, I am fat…but I’m not going to let that stop me from doing the things that I enjoy. Things like going on a summer holiday and wearing whatever I want. Not having to cover my body because society dictates that I should cover up my ‘obscene’ fat rolls. Seeing out fat rolls make the mythical ‘perfect people’ feel uncomfortable. It’s best to keep them covered at all times. Never mind the fact that those who do not fit into society’s little box feel uncomfortable every day of their life.
Oh, and to all those out there reading this thinking ‘Oh dear, here goes another fat girl trying to convince herself that she is beautiful and healthy. You are not paying attention! For starter I am beautiful no matter what my size is, and I do not need validation from other to confirm this. Also, I never once said that fat was a healthy choice, like I am not saying that being thin is a healthy choice… there is a lot more to it than that.
What I am saying is, it is MY choice and I have the right to be happy with the choices I make and so does everyone else. No matter what size, shape, colour or gender, EVERYONE has the right to be happy. As soon as the world realises this it will be a much happier and harmonious place.
Thanks for sticking with me this far, and if you are still reading, I hope this is the start of a beautiful friendship.
I know I talk about myself a lot, but I also love to hear other people’s stories. Whether you have embraced self-love or not, I would love to hear from you in the comments.